How not to loose hope and be positive

Hi my fellow bloggers. Today, I have been feeling very impatient because I really want to write something but I am not able to think of any topics.

And I was loosing all hope, even thought of deleting the blog. But, I know writing is something which makes me happy. And that’s how I didn’t loose hope. So, I thought of sharing some activities I do to be positive in life or not to loose hope. And this is not something I do everyday, because I am also learning to look at the positive side of life. And one cannot be positive all the time with so many things happening.

But, all we can do is try….

So here is a list of things which I try to inculcate in my life everyday to be happy and stay positive:

1. Meditation; this is something whenever I do even for 10 mins makes me feel better. Take our your emotions while meditating. Because, those are the emotions which are somewhere hidden deep in you and really needs to come out.

2. Gratitude list; yes you heard it right. Before I used to feel all this is just a waste of time. But, what’s the harm in showing gratitude to the universe and to the people who love you. ( I am very bad at communication and showing my emotions.)

3. Physical activity; any form of physical activity is really important. It helps you focus on your goals. Also, there are many benefits of moving your body.

4. Self care; no it’s not getting pampered in a salon. It’s about internal self care. Self care for me is taking a walk and listening to songs, dancing, doing yoga and eating what I like.

5. Procrastination; stop procrastinating and start doing.

6. Stop discussing people; stop discussing what others are doing in their life. Focus on yourself. Be with people who uplift you or discuss ideas.

7. Comparison; stop scrolling though social networking websites and comparing yourself with others. The grass is always greener on the other side. You don’t even know what they are going through.

8.Read; yes you heard it right. Reading and updating your knowledge is very important. Keep yourself updated.

That’s all for today. I hope this helps you keep focused on what you want to achieve.

I am also thinking of posting daily journal. Do comment if you think I should 🙂.

Broken… being hurt

Being hurt by someone you love is the worst thing ever… isn’t it?

But, being hurt over and over again.. means they have started taking you for granted or they don’t value you or you are just compromising( though, in your mind you just feel ‘they are being broken themselves.. so just let it

They are heartbroken, but that doesn’t give them the right to say hurtful things to you. Because we understand their situation, so in return we always want to treat them with love. But if they don’t understand move on… let them be.

In the end, if something is hurting you, then I would say talk it out. Let them know and then move on…

Soulmate…

Hello fellow bloggers , it’s the first time I have tried my hand at poem. The poem was written in Hindi but I have translated it in English. Though, somewhere there might be loss of originality but still I have tried to retain it. It’s written with a lot of love and emotions. Hope you like it 🙂

Being away from you has made me realise how close I have come to you.

Never , even in my dreams I had thought that this could happen… but now when it’s already done, then it’s permissible to think about you all the time ⏱

Your sweet little face with those almond shaped eyes come in front of me every time, and all I can do is just smile 😊.

I do not know why but when I am with you, I am not able to think about anything because all I want to do is be in that moment and just listen to you (you are so dear to me).

When I see you worrying about something or anything which makes you sad; my heart 💓 says ‘just go and pluck all the thorns from his way’.

Sometimes, I think how can someone come so close but can’t stay. At that moment all I want to do is hold your hand and stop the time.

People might say that it’s the start , may be its attraction but I know it’s not because I don’t expect anything in return from you.

Whether, you are with me in future or not , but I always want to see you happy.

And may be someday you will realise that there is someone who can love you to this extent.

This love is eternal…..

Why me??

We always ask this question in disappointment or when we fail, when we don’t get what we want. WHY ME? But, why do we only ask when things don’t go the way we expected. Why not before we are starting to walk on that path, “ why am I given this particular job, why did he chose me.”

Yes, I know it’s easier said than done. And of course, even I don’t do that. But, the point is when something doesn’t goes the way you want just sit and contemplate about it and ask the below questions or say to yourself –

May be I am so strong that’s why god chose me.

What lesson is he trying to teach me? (Go back and think about the lessons learnt).

Does he wants me to understand and get rid of a particular habit or my emotions to make me a stronger person?

When you start taking every outcome in a positive way whether you failed or passed, you will be one step ahead of others.

Positive attitude is very important in life. We have been born to learn and serve a purpose. So don’t give up.

So, next time when the tables don’t turn your way don’t give up. Just think that I have learnt a lesson and move on with it. 🙂

I hope you enjoyed today’s blog.

BANGALORE – Leaving this city with a smile 😊

Hi my fellow bloggers, I know I haven’t posted anything from quite a while. But I am back. So this blog is going to be about my journey in this beautiful city Bangalore, full of experiences and some sweet and sour memories.

So, finally the day has come to leave everything behind in Bangalore and start a new journey. Sitting at the Bangalore airport with every care taken for Covid, I am here writing my journal which is going to be a part of my blog.

Leaving this city I feel like I am leaving behind a part of me. These 4.3 years have taught me so many things; from professional to personal growth, creating memories, from meeting the best people to moving on from some. Also, I have learnt that how good I can be at managing my personal and professional life (I knew I have this quality but to this extent ☺️. After working for 12-13 hrs then coming back home, working out and cooking my own food. It’s a real task I am telling you).

So, let’s start from the beginning. I came to this city with no expectations. I had a job in hand but money being credited to my account never really excited me! It was more about learning and growing, and I am glad I am still the same.

Fortunately, I had found a roommate who was more than a friend. The sweetest, funniest, and craziest😝. We have had heathy discussions to having unhealthy food at a restaurant 😂.

So let’s start with YEAR 1. This year passed just like that. I learnt so many things in my work place. I met so many people who used to tease me to an extent that you won’t stop laughing.

YEAR 2 was more about meeting some people whom I really wanted to stay with but they never came back. So I learnt to leave them behind and move on in my life. ( which is not easy)

YEAR 3 was more like an emotional roller coaster. From finding a suitable guy for marriage to my professional life, everything was at halt and I was suffering meantally. My mind was blocked and slowly I was sulking into depression and the main reason was I didn’t had any one to talk.

The only good thing was I was taking care of my health. So, there was something which kept me going.

The last and the most memorable year of my life; YEAR 4. Because I met a special person( whom I would call a friend, who is now a part of my memory). Who motivated me write by saying “ when a person writes, they do that with a lot of emotions and experiences. So stop thinking about what people will say or think. JUST WRITE.” And you know these words motivated me, inspired me to write more and here I was with a blog on WordPress. 🙂 He is also the only one who inspired me to find the purpose of my life and showed me the path of spirituality.

So, this is how 4.3 years went by and I didn’t even realise what I have become. Today, when I look back realise I have come a long way. I always used to underestimate my struggles by saying, everyone goes through it, so it’s not a big deal. Yes, it’s true but your mindset during those struggles and your learning is what matters. And everyone’s learning can’t be same. Some may become negative and some may become more positive. It all depends on us how we want to take it.

I just want to summarise my experiences below before ending the blog:

1. Never give up. I would say fall 1,000 times but every time you get up you become stronger.

2. DO NOT STOP WORKING ON YOURSELF, keep on exploring new things. This life is given to us so that we can explore and understand ourselves better also spread love and joy wherever you go.

3. Realise your WORTH.

4. Keep on learning new things.

5. READ

6. Stay away from negativity.

7. Takeout time for yourself.

That’s all for today folks. I hope you enjoyed the blog. 🙂

Confused and indecisive…

Always confused when it comes to making decisions???

Why are people so confused? Because, the mind says A and heart says B. And you are stuck, not able to decide which one to choose.

But, how can you help yourself in getting out of these confusions. READ.

Read about different topics, people, and world. Have knowledge about everything. I am not saying that you need to have an in depth knowledge about everything. Now, why is this important? Having knowledge about everything, enhances your sphere, and you can take decisions without been confused.

You get confused only when you don’t have knowledge on a particular subject.

So, what I do when I get confused about choosing a job from 2 options available. The best thing is to realise what is more important for you, profile or money or the tag of an MNC!

Confused in love

Now, this is the most loved confusion we all have. Right 🙂 ?

Confused, whether I should wait for someone or move on..

Confused, whether I should say yes or no..

Confused, whether it was right meeting that person or not??

I would say first, focus on yourself. Self love, self development is more important. Once, you start accepting yourself the right person will stay.

Second, you can let things flow. Don’t close the doors. Keep it open.

So, here was a short and sweet blog which I wanted to write today. I hope it helps someone 🙂.

28 years of learning

Hi fellow bloggers. I have turned 29 today and I am writing this blog to remind myself of what I have learnt in all these years.🙂 I will be posting this blog on my birthday. Well, this blog will consist of even the small things that I have learnt in my life. So, please bear with me😂.

  • Live each day as it’s your last : I tell you it’s hard because you would want to do everything, but most importantly you want to be happy on your last day. So, smile everyday. And in these times it’s hard.
  • Take out atleast 10 mins for your body: Working out is very very very important. I cannot stress more on this. It releases good hormones, keeps you on your toes and there are many benefits( which we can discuss some other time).
  • Living alone makes you wiser: There is nothing new in what I have said but trust me it makes you stronger, bolder and just add all the words which you think are positive in terms of persons individuality. There will be times you will be broke, you would want someone to listen to you or may be hug you. There will be times when you will feel like no one understands you. And it’s okay all these situations will only make you stronger.

And of course there is a positive side to this as well 😝 you can live in those shorts, you don’t have to worry who is there who is not.

  • You should fall in love once in a lifetime: Ever wondered why it’s important to fall in love? Because it teaches you to be caring, loving, peaceful. It teaches you that love can change your whole perspective about life.
  • Be with people who are as ambitious as you: If you are ambitious enough, want to do something different in your life be with people who are same. Because they will listen, support and motivate you. They will understand why you feel in a particular way and will try to pick you up. But, remember people can just guide us , its us who needs to take the charge. 🙂
  • Friends who don’t support your dreams or motivate you to achieve them, aren’t friends. They just can’t see your growth so stay away from them.
  • You are on this earth for a purpose, so keep on exploring do not stop thinking that ‘Oh! I have a great job.’ Don’t be stuck by what everyone says. Keep on exploring!
  • No matter how someone behaves with you, be at peace do not react. Don’t let others affect your peace.
  • Move away from people who demean you. It doesn’t matter how close you are to someone, but if they always put you down don’t stay with them. Move ahead.
  • Life is a learning process, you evolve every day, your perspective keeps on changing as you grow older. I personally feel that as you grow old, you become wiser.
  • Be aware of what’s going on in the world . Watch news, read articles, listen to different people with different opinions and then take a decision. Being aware is the most important thing . Which I have realised now.
  • Love your body… be happy with what you have got. You are beautiful in your own ways. The person who truly loves you will find you beautiful at your worst.
  • Workout and eat. Do not forget to eat just because you want to loose weight. It’s very important. There are lakhs of people struggling with body image issues. Love yourself.
  • Save money. It’s very important to save money and invest in different options available in the market. Save atleast 70% of your monthly income.
  • Travel a lot. Now I don’t mean you spend all your money on travel. Look out for options that are cheaper yet not compromising your comfort. In fact I feel it’s really important to travel alone. It makes you know yourself better.
  • Stand up for yourself. No body is going to come forward for you. You need to take charge of yourself.
  • Have a hobby and work on it. Think what you like to do during your free time and work on it. Keep on doing something , don’t sit idle. It’s okay to take breaks in between but keep on working. Your body is designed to work not sit.
  • Leave that job where you don’t feel like every day is a new beginning. When you go to work if you have that excitement for the job then you are at the right place.
  • Interact with people at work. It’s very important to do so because you never know what fascinating idea one can have. There is a lot to learn from everyone as each of us has had a different experience.
  • Gratitude, is very important. Be thankful for everything you have. The things you have may be someone else is struggling to have it.
  • Don’t suppress your emotions. Whether it’s anger, love, happiness or sadness. Suppressing emotions will only make you think more, and will lead you to depression or sadness.
  • Communication, the most important thing to be happy. Leave that relationship, that job, that friend where you are not able to communicate. Communication is key to for a healthy relationship and success at job.
  • Self care and acceptance is very important. Self care isn’t only about going to a salon and getting a haircut. I am talking about inner self care. MEDITATE on your thoughts, and ask “ why am I feeling in this way?” It’s difficult but eventually you will get there.
  • Be close to nature, it will refresh your mind and also you will understand yourself better.
  • Accepting yourself the way you are is the key to change. Once you know your negatives , and you try working on them. That’s where you have accepted yourself. REMEMBER accepting your negatives is a big deal.
  • Make books your best friend. I believe it’s really important to read good books, as it increases the sphere of your thinking and ofcourse knowledge.
  • Accept the fact that everyone has different perspective. Don’t try to prove yourself right if the other person different views. Views develop on the basis of experience and it’s different for everyone. Also, try not to get into discussion with people who try to prove themselves and not listen to you.

Thank you so much for reading the blog. Lastly, I just wanted to say that I will try posting blog once in a month. As it’s been really long I have posted something. Just a bit occupied these days. And probably I will try to write on a health related topic in the next blog.

What is love?

How I thought about writing this blog?? I was just listening to the song by No Mercy; what is love, baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me no more 🥁🥁. And was just thinking to myself about that one thing we all strive and deserve i.e. LOVE.

Well, I have always been that girl who is strong and wants to focus on her career. Probably, because I am fighting with my under confident self everyday, where one voice says “you are not that beautiful that someone will like you”. And the other says, “ you are smart, intelligent and an independent girl ; who won’t fall for you”.

I have always been saying to myself, learn to love yourself first, then everything will start falling in place. And, I am admitting it today, it all looks good in books and movies they make it look so easy, but in reality it’s very difficult.

So, according to what I have learnt all these years when I was trying to love myself is that there is no such thing as love.

It’s like when you talk to someone and you have this feeling, “Yes this person is just like me”. And we start liking them and we want to be with them.

So to sum up there should be understanding, likability and belongingness with the other person that’s when you want to be with them, that’s when you say ; I am in love!

So today I will not say love yourself first, I will say understand yourself first, ask yourself this question, what do you want?

Once, you get the answer for this question, you are going in the right direction and you will find similar kind of people on the path.( if you know what I mean 🙂 ).

Male Depression #BREAKTHESILENCE

#BREAKTHESILENCE with Fertility Dost, India’s trusted platform for managing fertility health. #FertilityDostContest

Hi!

Today’s post is very different, because I usually don’t write about “men” in my blogs. But, I have taken part in blog contest organised by Fertility Dost. And, all these days I have been thinking about what to write but I was left with 0 ideas. Suddenly, I remembered the tagline “BREAKTHESILENCE” and I thought of writing about men. Because I feel they suffer in silence the most. (I have talked about it later, in my post).

While doing my research on how many men reach out for help? The results stated that only 38% of men take therapy (as per Men’s Health Week 2016 data). Which is shocking, thinking about why is it so low, I looked around myself and got the answers.

PATRIARCHAL FORM OF SOCIETY

We live in a patriarchal form of society, where males are physically stronger. The society we live in has taught men not to cry, because you are male. By inculcating these thoughts from childhood men tend to suppress their emotions.

They are also burdened with responsibilities, related to studies and job. Because of course they can only be the sole earning member of their families (not to be taken in literal sense, what I am trying to say is women take break after a point from their career but men usually don’t). The burden of such thoughts, can be so stressful because they have to earn for their parents, their wife and children.

I feel men, are burdened with responsibilities at every stage of their life. Whether, its childhood or being an adult, a husband, or a father. And, been taught that they can’t be weak in front of others, they keep it to themselves not opening up in front of others.

Some of them are strong mentally, they cope up with the hardships but others are not able to (and its absolutely fine).

But, now is the time we need to come out of this bubble. And, tell our boys its OKAY to cry, its OKAY to be physically weaker, its OKAY if you don’t understand or feel that you are not ready to take responsibilities.

RAPE

Secondly, let’s talk about the men who are raped. Men are never been taken seriously, when it comes to rape. First of all they are afraid to come out in public and talk about it. And in most of the cases men rape men, for example in boys hostel, ragging is a very common phenomenon. During such incidents the seniors sexually abuse the juniors. And it usually never comes out, because no one will trust a guy for being raped.

BEING A GAY

Let’s talk about gay men, in India now we have given LGBTQ rights. But, still parents won’t accept their gay child giving minute reasons. How many men come out and say that I am gay. The reason is society still doesn’t wants to accept them. They are the one’s suffering in silence.

What can be done, societal acceptance. When society starts accepting people as human beings, world would be a better place.

OPPORTUNITY IN EDUCATION AND JOBS

Not only this, we talk about equality but even in education and government jobs we have female quota but no male quota. Here, again there is a race for men to prove themselves.

It’s time we need to understand, if we talk about equality, we need to consider all the sections of the society. Focusing only on one, is not going to help anyone.

Breaking the silence doesn’t mean fight or oppress others. It means acceptance and listen to everyone, irrespective of the gender.

INFERTILITY

Men are burdened with the thought of taking their Vansh forward. Making them suffer about the fact that they can be infertile.

What I understand is if all these pressures or responsibilities are shed off from one shoulder then condition of women will also improve.

Most importantly, its okay to talk, to BREAK THE SILENCE and not suffer. Nobody is going to judge you , just because you have more testosterone in your body.

I would close this post asking only one question: Are you ready to talk or is the patriarchal form of society stopping you?

SEXUAL VIOLENCE IN MOVIES : OBJECTIFYING WOMEN

Hello my fellow readers 🙂

Today’s topic is absolutely different from my previous posts and it’s because i have been watching some documentaries on YouTube and movies on Netflix. And it triggered me to write this post. Well, it’s not the first time , that something like this has got me up on my feet and write, it has been before like indulging in a discussion with friends ( but with no conclusions, because for them a movie is just a movie) and being angry after watching such movies.

I don’t understand why I get so furious after I watch movies in which men just want to overpower women or harass them by being physically stronger.

Anyways, I decided to write on this topic after going through some videos in Instagram related to women who are standing up against the sexual violence after years.

First of all I do not understand the motive of the director or writer who make such movies, what message are they trying to give. What I only understand is by making a movie on SEX is definitely going to attract a lot of audience and ultimately they will make more money.

But, do they ever think about what is it going to lead to???? More sexual and domestic violence, more rapes, more kidnapping.

And what impact is it going to have on young minds ( who are the major audiences for such movies)? They will pacify themselves by trying the same sort of sexual behaviour towards their girls. Which doesn’t even sounds exciting.

Secondly, stop objectifying women “just” as a source of pleasure. We are more than you can think about.

Thinking about those who suffer everyday makes me wonder how triggering it must be for them watching all such movies.

WHAT CAN BE DONE

Awareness about the rights is important. Women need to stand up for their rights. What I mean is understand your rights and reach out to the right person. Now, I know it’s not possible for everyone to do this but you need to think ahead.

Young men and women should be watching such movies with consent.

Consent of the girl is important when it comes to indulging in physical activity.

LETS TALK ABOUT STATISTICS

If you check statistics domestic violence has increased manifold during the lockdown, rapes have increased, sexual harassment has increased. In many cases during lockdown the rapist is one of the closest blood relatives.

Let’s take an example : when you watch these movies, where they pretend to enjoy the moments of sexual pleasure. The effect of watching such television is, we tend to fantasise about pleasure ( and that’s where we can agree ). These fantasies are a result of watching movies which are scripted and when it doesn’t happen in real life, the person tends to be angry or fight with their partners or force themselves upon the other.

As per research, results shows in 2013 there were 500,000 searches for teen porn. The results are dated 7 years back. So that must have increased manifolds.

My main motto for writing this blog is objectification of women in movies. Personally, I believe such movies give strength to people who consider women as piece of entertainment/ object to rape them, or mentally harass them.

I hope more people understand the importance of this blog post and spread the word.

Thank you for reading. 🙂